Couples have a life cycle. At first things seem like they are perfect and that you want to be with this person everyday for the rest of your life. After awhile, things change and mature and you might experience a bit of a power struggle, and your once blissful union is now riddled with arguments, misunderstandings, and annoyances too big to ignore. Couples come in when they are having troubles, but the power struggle phase it is part of the life cycle of the relationship and not an indication that the relationship is doomed to fail. I encourage couples to work through their differences, learn interdependence while respecting and promoting the exercise of eachother's free-will. Communication is a key factor in the success of relationships.
Oftentimes family members think, "If Johnny would just quit acting like this, everything in our family would be just fine!" Johnny is dragged into treatment and nothing changes in him or the problems in the family. Johnny is not stubborn or resistant, he is just playing his part in helping the family function the way it normally does. Stability and predictibility are valued over the stress of change or chaos. Everyone in a family group plays a role to create a sense of stability and those methods are not always functional or helpful to the other members. A family may only be as strong as its weakest link, but it is that percieved weakest link that often informs the family that something in the way everyone is interacting NEEDS TO CHANGE.